Getting Into a Perfect Routine ??.. You're Kidding. You Are Just a Human.

Have you ever tried to be a perfectionist in daily routine?. Have you set certain strict personal goals for your immediate future?. Have you ever been able to achieve your goals?. Do you give yourself any allowances while analyzing your quest of being a perfectionist in personal daily routine?. What do you do when you disappoint yourself in that regard? Do you think about all these things at all?.

Sometimes, I do.

I will give one example (And this time, it's from my own life !!.. And it's absolutely personal and true, Mr. Anonymous :) ):

Ever since I came to the States, I have always been a 'nite man'. I was a regular in the 2.50 AM bus in Clemson; and even otherwise I would be awake till 3 AM or so. It was a habit, and I thought that schedule suited me the best. I used to really concentrate well in the 10 PM to 2 AM period. This habit continued in Cleveland as well (well, I had too many home works and assignments to do; I have spent more nite-outs in past 8 months, than any other period of my life so far)

Anyways, on January 1st 2006, on the new year's eve, I made a resolution that I would be a 'day man'.

Everyone in my lab comes early (Cynthia comes at 5.30 AM, and Rick comes at 6 AM), and everyone else is generally there by 9 or so. I come pretty late, and leave late. I wanted to change that.

My 'concept' of a perfect day is to wake up at 7, be in the lab by 8, work, take a lunch break at noon, work, leave at 5.30; then go to gym in the evening, play racquetball or work out, come home, have lite dinner, relax a bit, read some book, and go to sleep at 11.

It seemed to be bit too perfect, but I thought it would be really good to get into this routine, and make it a habit. It was fairly challenging to me to change my daily routine, and habits; but I wanted to give it a try. I was striving for 'that' perfection in life.

I tried, I am still trying, but I haven't been able to achieve what I wanted to. I tried hard to hit bed at 11, but something or other prevented me from doing that. I tried the extreme self-control methods as well: Stopped doing nite-outs, stopped doing Thursday nite outings, switched off my mobile at 11, made it a habit to read something interesting every day, completely stopped chatting... I improved my eating habits, I started working out regularly... yet... I am yet to have "that" perfect day. Invariably I dont sleep before 1 or 2. My brain just refuses to stop working before that. Nite time is my favorite time: I sometimes do blogging, sometimes catching up with things happening around the world, sometimes watch a good game a cricket.

Even in daytime, something or else comes up: like home works, quizzes, or problems with experiments and data analysis; you name it!!. But "that" perfect day hasn't yet arrived.

Why is it so difficult?... It seems to be a really trivial thing to maintain a normal "perfect" routine; Then why??... Am I setting my goals too high??... Am I trying to get something that is beyond my reach?... Is it impossible??. I havent given up yet.

...

I tried talking about it with A.

A Said: " Buddy, you are thinking too much. Dont think so much about these crappy things. Just enjoy life. Go clubbing, have some drinks, have fun. Some girls are pretty hot, I enjoy dancing with them till late... may be till 2 or 3. You must be a fool to try sleeping at 11. Get a life for yourself".

Fool.. I was not. I want to be a "day man". And I also enjoy my life totally the way I want ( I am writing a blog on that as well) , may be my ways of enjoying life are different than A's.

Then I asked B about it.

B said: "Vivek, you know where are you going wrong?, You are not being yourself. You are trying to be someone who is totally different than what you are. May be you will get a good routine going; but will that make you happy?. Happiness lies in just being yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. You are doing very well with your work and studies; and that should be a good enough reason to be happy. Why do you want more?. Why are you striving for perfection. Dont worry about it, this is just one phase in your life, I am sure you will be on a good routine once things start getting less hectic, you are done with qualifiers, and your research gets more organised."

Sometimes B talks sense. May be B was right.

Yet, I am not able to find a satisfactory answer on whether to strive for perfection or just live life the way one pleases to.

I am liking this new phase though; am feeling much healthier and energetic. I guess at the moment, I am in the purification phase :D. So I dont know if I will resume my favorite nite outs and Thursday nites; at the moment I am happy with the way it is going.